America the Rotund

Yes I'm overweight. About 35 pounds overweight. I've heard, though, that I'm not in a minority since most of America has a weight problem. In fact, the World Health Organization names America as the "fattest country on earth."  Some of us are mildly overweight- about 10-20 lbs; some of us just plain fat,- about 20-50lbs overweight,( like me);  some of us obese- 50 plus pounds; and some of us are so big, we have objects orbiting around us. How disgusting.

The news that the New York city health department now requires fast food chains to post calories on their menus brings me to the point of this story. Now that there are so many of us bulging around the waist, it was time for the government to step in. Now when we go to a McDonalds's, we'll know just how much that Big Mac will cost us in calories. Just think of it, no more wondering if this stuff will add to our "bottom line".  Let's see, a Big Mac is 600 calories!! Wow! Well, I'm off to Whole Foods to buy a head of lettuce. Wait a minute, I can have a McSalad instead. Yeah, that's the ticket from now on it's McSalads only. But, what about Burger King?  A Whopper has got to be less calories. In fact, I know a six piece fried chicken meal at KFC has got to be less calories, I mean it's chicken, right?  You know what though?  I really wanted a burger! Screw this I'm having a double cheeseburger with bacon, it's 20 calories less than the Big Mac. See, it worked! If those calories weren't posted, I would have had that Big Mac. I saved twenty calories! Now I can have a milkshake!  Right. Anybody sensing some sarcasm here. Yeah, me too.

The government. Our Big Brother. Our Father. Our Mother. That's the point. Why do we have to have this? When will we, as people, go back to taking responsibility for ourselves, and our children. Yeah, it's good to know you can ask about calories, but is it just about fast food?  What about high end food establishments? Let's take Morton's Steak House for instance. Now, I'm not picking on Morton's, but you have a 16oz. strip steak, a loaded baked potato, some sauteed mushrooms and mud pie for desert,you can bet it's going to be more calories than a meal at McDonald's. I know, I looked it up! No requirements for that to be posted on the menu though. It's not fast food. Our brilliant lawmakers want to post fast food because they believe most of Americas blubber problem comes from this. A family of five on a low income is not going to be eating at Morton's.  They need to be educated, according to the government. Well, if they can't figure out that a Quarter Pounder with cheese is not exactly health food, than they don't care what the calorie count is. A guy made a movie called "Super Size Me", about how he ate at a McDonald's every day for a month and gained 30 plus pounds. Do you think? Nothing against this guys movie making skills, but we couldn't figure the ending out? Eat a Grand Slam at Denny's twice a day and see what happens. I watched a ballgame at a buddy's house and we were all digging into six varieties of potato chips and four different beers. The calories are posted on every bag and bottle. We are all overweight, (except one guy who's thin enough to hide behind a wheat stalk and he had a heart attack last year-go figure). But, no one cared because that's what we wanted to eat. Mom and the three kids wants some Happy meals at Mickie D's, and that's what they are going to get. Calorie count or not.

Now, some of  you are thinking, "We think its good to post this info about calories, it might save a life, or keep us healthier". Maybe so. Nothing wrong with posting it. It just doesn't need to be a law. More things for the government to control, means more government employees to police it, means higher taxes. My waist may not shrink, but my wallet will. McDonald's has a website with all the nutrition facts, and flyers on the counter in the stores, so police yourselves.  But, if your that health conscious, or on some strict diet, going to a fast food place is like buying a $300,000 Ferrari, and complaining about the gas mileage. Stay the hell out of fast food places. As far as us "fatso's" causing insurance premiums to go up (we've heard this one before), then let's all get thin, and if the insurance companies lower their premiums, I got a bridge for sale.

Moderation. Control yourselves. Use some common sense. I haven't, that's why I have to look in the mirror to see my,- well you know. But, I don't blame anyone, and don't expect anyone to pass laws because I can't drive past a pizza parlor without spotting.  I know pizza has got calories, and a lot of them. Posted or not. That famous line in the movie "The Godfather" wasn't " Leave the gun, and check the calorie count on the cannolis before you take them". Get the point. Hmmm, cannolis.....!!  Maybe I'll just have half of one. 

Comments

[Joe]

Goodfella,

I know you qualified your statement by indicating you weren't taking a shot at Morton's, and I am sure that the fact that you did reference Morton's probably means you have eaten there(and I hope you will be back), but I felt compelled to chime in and set the record straight. In the spirit of full disclosure let me point out that I work with Morton's.

The fact is Morton's does provide the caloric intake numbers for all of their dishes. And this dispite not being mandated to do so.

I know it is a small bone to pick (no pun intended) in an otherwise spot on assessment of an obesity epidemic that is plaguing this country but there is a lot of mis/dis information that floats around and the more accurate we can be the better.

Best,

Joe O'Donnell

[jdhayes]

How true! I couldn't agree more. Now, if you'll excuse me, this posting made me hungry for McDonald's. :-) :-)